Posts by Pete Zahut

10

Hello and and introduction to Virtue Signaling

by WobblyVern in

hi all - perhaps a brief intro from me would be appropriate..... i hail from essex, england.

a 2nd generation witness never knowing any other life and from a large and mostly devout family.

i was disfellowshipped in 1993 aged 21 and the worldly girl i met, got pregnant and married (in that order) is mother to my 3 grown children and grandmother to our beautiful baby granddaughter.

Pete Zahut

I suppose one could say the JW version of this is when they haul some local family on the platform at the assembly and the family talks about how lively and fun their family study is. All the kids chime in and talk about how they can't wait for family study night and they all try to have some interesting point prepared to discuss.

Every kid in the audience is rolling their eyes or gagging on their own bile and most of the parents are wondering why getting their kids to sit down for the family study,is such a knock down drag out fight. The rest of the audience has tuned the whole thing out or has come to the conclusion that everyone else is more spiritual than they are and there's no point even trying anymore.

I remember there was this 20 something girl named "Laura" in our hall that constantly tried to impress everyone about how "spiritual" she was. A bunch of us were walking out the door after the Watchtower study and she piously announced to all who could hear "That was such a good article....I'm going to study it again when I get home !". One of the more outspoken sisters said under her breath but loud enough for everyone to hear " Shut up Laura...you friggin' weirdo!" Everyone within earshot started openly snickering...it was an awesome moment LOL!

10

Hello and and introduction to Virtue Signaling

by WobblyVern in

hi all - perhaps a brief intro from me would be appropriate..... i hail from essex, england.

a 2nd generation witness never knowing any other life and from a large and mostly devout family.

i was disfellowshipped in 1993 aged 21 and the worldly girl i met, got pregnant and married (in that order) is mother to my 3 grown children and grandmother to our beautiful baby granddaughter.

Pete Zahut

I don't see a link....is this the article you're talking about? HERE

or HERE

5

Need your honest opinion

by poopie in

jw
friends

this is the scenario there's a guy who is df and being shunned big time.

we'll he needs a place to stay since he can't stay with his family you know the shunning thing well another jw in good standing says he can stay with him .the df guy is delighted but a little problem the elders are going to find out the df guy car parked at jw house.

no one in the area knows he's df because it's 90 miles from the cong he was df in so i told him he's takeing a risk but he says i'm going to show love to this person no matter what..

Pete Zahut

So if your asking our opinion on whether or not the JW should let the DF'd guys stay in his house, I'd say yes he should if that's what he wants to do. The congregation 90 miles away shouldn't be a problem, but he'll have to figure out what to say when one or more of the local JW's notices someone is staying with him.

Since the DF'd guy isn't a JW anymore, he could be passed off as a "worldly" friend (which he now is) who had shown "interest" in the past (which he once did) and is now in need of temporary help.

60

Stephanie Fessler v Watch Tower - Trial on Tuesday, Feb. 7, 2017 in Pennsylvania

by AndersonsInfo in

http://avoidjw.org/2017/02/stephanie-fessler-v-watch-tower/.

stephanie fessler v watch tower.

stephanie fessler was brought up as a jehovah’s witness by her parents, jodee and kevin.

Pete Zahut

I can see how the Watchtower Society would be guilty because of their policy to handle these situations within the Congregation but once the parents discovered what was going on, shouldn't they be equally responsible for things having "escalated" between the girl and the older woman, later on?

Police report or not, in my mind the parents were negligent for not keeping their daughter out of harms way once they became aware of the situation.

I don't want to blame the victim here but at 15, isn't the girl somewhat responsible for allowing things to continue once things became known? It's not like she was a helpless 6 year old. If I'm reading things correctly, it seems crazy that she can sue the Watchtower for their irresponsibility, yet her parents, who were obviously not monitoring the girl very well all those years, are somehow not being charged.

28

Birthday Wishes Welcome!

by LifesNotOver in

jw
friends

many of you don't know me or won't remember me.

i left the jw's and my husband and my home last september - forging a new life in a new town.

i haven't posted here for many months, but have been reading most days.

Pete Zahut

Science has proven that the longer a person lives, the more Birthdays they will have.

Happy 71st !

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJHFV4eOHA4

10

Goodbye friends

by Freeandclear in

jw
friends

i'm not killing myself lol i just wanted to say a short goodbye.

i'm not leaving forever, i'm sure i'll pop in here and there but for the most part i haven't felt the need to check in here as often as i used to so i thought i'd say so long.

this journey we're all on (life) and trying to make sense of it all is a very personal one.

Pete Zahut

Bye bye Freeandclear,

I don't believe we've ever met and it's probably safe to say you've never actually met anyone else who frequents this site, but thanks just the same for your concern and for the backhanded and self serving compliments, and for the assumptions you made about our sad lives.

Somehow I'll continue slogging through my pathetic existence with my lovely wife, 2 fine sons, darling new granddaughter, good job, nice coworkers, good health, beautiful home etc. It seems you pity me and those like me because we are still interested in the people we've encountered here but the main thing is, you got what you needed and have a new found sense of superiority to carry you through the rest of your life.

Pete

20

Why do you get upset about family shunning you?

by mr_doubtful in

i understand people love their family but i also don't understand why you end up caring in the end.

i'm ready to leave and i 100% don't expecting my family to have any contact with me nor do i want them to contact me.

if they are going to chose a man made religion over me, that's their choice and i will sleep easy at night.

Pete Zahut

It might feel good to be done with them all and have your final say but when it comes to family and friends I'd advise you not to draw any lines in the sand or burn any bridges.

Offer them no explanations or excuses as to your new lifes course as it relates to the JW religion. Just keep what you know to yourself and go on about your business and sustain as little damage as possible. Why not have your cake and eat it too? It's not your responsibility to save or enlighten anyone else or suffer for some noble cause. That's one of those JW things you have to rid yourself of.

I've found that JW's are puzzled and even intrigued when they realize that they and their religion are mere passing thoughts to you. They are almost disappointed when you don't become a raving apostate who's life has become a train wreck.

52

My families shunning has gone to a whole new level

by pale.emperor in

8 months df'd.

loving a life of freedom.

however, my family are all shunning me.

Pete Zahut

It's like the news and all the hype that was going on during the election....I did a news fast figuring if I didn't watch it....it didn't exist. Guess what...it worked ! It wasn't that I was hiding out...it was more a case of not putting my emotional well being in harms way.

Your mother has made it clear what she's about. If I were you I'd take a fast from your family and stop putting yourself in harms way. By doing so, her shunning doesn't exist.

26

Do you think I should get something for my wife for her birthday?

by schnell in

jw
friends

my wife is still nominally in, but only because it "makes me (her) happy".

there is nothing academic about her beliefs and when i try, she interprets me as negative.. but then she cusses like a sailor and watches certain movies with me.

her birthday is coming up and it's also right around valentine's day.

Pete Zahut

Those are great ideas, guys. Anti-birthday present and a nice dinner.Love it.

Take her out and all it a Birth "Date".

22

Does the Jehovah's Witnesses religoius cult create people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder ?

by Finkelstein in

the american psychiatry association lists nine symptoms – if someone ticks five of these, they could have narcissistic personality disorder.

the nine points of narcissism.

has a grandiose sense of self-importance.. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.. believes that he or she is ‘special’ and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people.. requires excessive admiration.. has a sense of entitlement.. is inter-personally exploitative (takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends).. lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others.. is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her.. shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.. .

Pete Zahut

I think we are all narcissistic to some degree. We are programmed/wired to survive and even though we are capable of truly caring for others, we look out for ourselves first.

The JW religion feeds the narcissistic part of the human personality by constantly reminding it's members that they have an inside track with God and will be the only survivors of his wrath. They convince their members that it's loving concern for others that stirs them to do good works even though it's really about saving their own skins, first and foremost.

When a JW shuns a former Witness, it's not really about loyally sticking up for Jehovah. It's mostly an opportunity for them to feel superior and extra virtuous yet humble in a Watchtower approved way.